British child protection authorities have been lobbying Facebook and other social networking sites to install a one-click button which can allow children to get immediate police help if they suspect they're at risk.
Calls for Facebook to install the button intensified following the kidnap, rape and murder of 17-year-old Ashleigh Hall. Her killer, Peter Chapman, used a bogus Facebook identity to befriend her online.
Harriet Harman, the deputy leader of Britain's governing Labour Party, said Thursday ministers were lobbying Facebook to adopt the button.
How do you feel about this concept, and do you think it would make a difference?
I feel a bit conflicted about the whole idea myself and, being that this is my blog, I'm gonna take this opportunity to tell you why.
First off, it certainly wouldn't hurt to have such a "Panic Button" available to the more vulnerable Facebook users, and if it were to enable law enforcement to catch, arrest, and prosecute even one cyber-predator, all the better.
My issue is that we, as a group of relatively intelligent beings (assuming that this expanse of knowledge and wisdom encompasses the entire Nation, and perhaps beyond) should know better how to protect and to T.R.A.I.N our kids: Teach our kids about the lurking dangers of the internet. Regulate their computer usage. Administer their content. Incorporate healthy and safe boundaries and alternatives, and Never allowing them to go out and meet a "cyber-friend" without your tagging along to ensure the validity of this person.
Don't just pick one of these items, or some of them some of the time; we need to implement the entire TRAINing concept at all times while they are still young - 8 years to 18 years old. It is certainly not recommended to allow children younger than 8 to peruse the internet at all without a responsible adult closely monitoring at all times.
In addition, I can't say enough about Internet Monitoring Software. This is a completely stealth manner in which to closely monitor the sites our kids navigate to, their emails, both sent and received, their chats, their passwords, etc. Kids get the false sense of security that they are being sly and undetected when they enter into their own world of internet interactions, but when you log into the monitoring software, you can see exactly to whom they are saying what to.
So while I applaud and encourage the social networking companies to do whatever they can to prevent any further victims from being lured into the cyber-predators web, I don't believe the fault lies with them; it is our society, our communities, the parent and the guardian that is failing today's youth. We are simply not paying close enough attention the problem that is right in front of us. We are allowing our kids to frolic in the same playground as we are engaged in, and justifying it by allowing them carte blanche. And for the technophobes who aren't nearly as adept in this relatively strange new world of cyberspace, you may be simply too ignorant to know what these dangers are, and that too is not a good excuse when it comes to safeguarding your children. It's time to wake up and take action. T.R.A.I.N. your kids.
However, with all of this said, the best advice I can offer from my own experiences is to promote, maintain and nourish a good, healthy dialogue between you and your kids. Get to know them better, and get to know their friends too. Ask questions, lots of them. It may seem like your are perturbing them, but this is just normal teenage expression for setting boundaries, creating a mote around their new-found independence, controlling the drawbridge, and peering out continually for reassurance that they are being loved, cared for and watched over.
My kids simply love to hate my incessant inquisitions. They insist that it is due to my being a cop, and now a Private Investigator, but I continually explain that it has nothing to with those facts, and only due to my boundless love for them and my inherent duties as a father to ensure their safety and quality of life.
It is the job of a child, especially a teenager, to test the boundaries, to push all our buttons, to take risks, and to experience an endless supply of disappointment. It is similarly our job to maintain the boundaries, uphold the discipline, reduce the risks and to embrace our children when they are hurting. This is the dance that we must all learn to dance with grace.
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